We all start off our weight loss program with high hopes and motivation. After all, that’s the whole reason we took action in the first place.
But that initial spark of motivation rarely lasts long. Within weeks we’re back to our regular selves wondering how to get out of this funk. We beat ourselves up and question our ability to ever be able to lose weight.
Should I just give up? Am I missing something? Why is this not working?!?
What’s Your Motivation?
Everyone’s motivation for losing weight is different. There isn’t a right or wrong answer. It’s whatever moves you to take action.
But what gets you going isn’t always what’s going to keep you going.
I’ve found that when people focus on appearance as their sole reason for wanting to lose weight that their motivation tends to dwindle.
Weight loss is such a slow process that people generally don’t have the patience to see it through. They need more instant gratification and losing weight doesn’t give that to them.
Instead, I like to see people going deeper. We really try to define our “why” for losing weight.
The true reasons tend to elicit a strong emotional response. It’s this emotion that gives us a sense of real purpose.
When you’re struggling with motivation make sure your why is strong enough and that you are constantly revisiting it. Move beyond surface levels reasons and go deeper.
What benefits do you get from losing weight? Why is that important to you? How will your relationships change? Will they change? Should they change? Will other people see you differently? Will it matter? Will your confidence improve?
Ask yourself these questions. Uncover your true motivation for change.
Are You Enjoying the Process?
The other big reason motivation disappears is people aren’t enjoying the process. They get so focused on the end goal of weight loss that they forget it’s just the side effect of the process of enjoying moving your body and eating healthy foods.
If you don’t like moving your body and exercising, and you don’t like the food you’re eating, it doesn’t matter how much weight you lose – you’ll never stick with it.
Motivation comes from enjoying the exercise you do and the food you eat – not the results that they give you.
When you focus on the now and process you get the instant gratification that’s necessary to keep the motivation cycle going. You do the exercise you do because it makes you feel amazing.
It challenges you. It makes you feel more confident. It feels good to move your body.
When you make that association your motivation becomes self-reinforcing. Action, reward. Action, reward. There’s no waiting for the end result to happen.
So make sure every choice you’re making is because you actually like it – not the result it gives you. Choose exercise you love. Eat food that gives you satisfaction and makes you feel good.
Stay mindful of that positive association. Make the connection between what you do and how it makes you feel.
You’ll never question your motivation or dedication to change again.
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I’ve always been fixated on my appearance and I never get very far with it. I’ll give your way a shot.
Nothing to lose by having a different perspective on your lifestyle. Find out why you’re doing this and who you’re really doing it for. And then keep going back to it.
How many days per week should we strength train? I like it but I don’t love it.
Hi Cindy, it just depends on what you’re trying to accomplish. As a general rule I say between 1-3 workouts per week. But only if you enjoy it.
Make sure you’re mostly strength training because you like it and not so much because it creates a result. It’s the only way you’ll stick with it.
If you don’t love it but want to, find new ways to challenge yourself. Change up your workout and add some skill elements to it.
I needed this email today! I do have a question about exercise. I have mobility issues so I can’t stand and exercise like many. I do walk some but even that is limited. I started with a online instructional program that was geared towards getting you more mobile. I like it but after three months I am bored with it. Not being able to stand and move easily makes it boring now. I have started using dance fitness but I can’t do the leg and feet work. I really enjoy it and do about an hour each day. Is that enough or even really exericise? I have been told I need to exercise till I want to throw up, till I am drenched in sweat and exhausted. That is the only way it can help me. I physically can’t do that right now. Should I be doing something different? I do enjoy the dance but I don’t want to fool myself into thinking I am exercising and really not.
Thank you for your motivation today I truly needed it.
Hi Julie, you don’t need to exercise until you’re drenched in sweat, exhausted, and want to throw up. No one is going to continue to exercise if they know that’s what they have to look forward to.
Exercise is meant to build you up, not tear you down. So just do what you physically can and enjoy moving your body.
My problem here is that absolutely HATE to sweat…I have a problem with excessive head sweating and feeling it running through my hair is gross, I’ve never found an form of exercise that I enjoy enough to make me want to do it again and I really don’t understand the concept of it making you feel good…it just makes me tired, sweaty, aching and leaves me counting how much time I have before I have to do it all again. I know this is all negative but that’s how I’ve been about it all my life and I don’t know how to turn it round.
Yeah that’s a tough one. Do you like to walk? It’s a sweatless workout for most. You can listen to music or a podcast to enjoy it more. But if you really don’t like it then don’t do it. Focus on your nutrition. After a while you might get the itch to give exercise a shot again. Get the momentum going in the right direction.
Thanks for that. It’s the first time I’ve heard any ‘fitness’ person acknowledge the problem and suggest a sensible way forward without making me feel like I’m just plain lazy. I really wish I could find something I truly liked because I absolutely agree that if you don’t like it then you won’t keep it up! So thank you.
I used to feel that way too. I have tried so many different things. Finally have found Yoga and Bowling. Does not make me sweaty and I enjoy both. Doing two Yoga and one bowling each week. It’s something I can handle that I enjoy and does not make me feel bad afterwards. If you do try Yoga, start with restorative which is about the gentlest and most sweat free. It’s not as energetic as other forms of exercise but it does improve fitness.
Yoga is something I haven’t tried. I will have a look at some classes and have a go if I can find a beginner’s class. Thank you.
Yes, i also feel the same. I feel guilty after 1 week “enjoying” my unhealhty food and skip my gym session. Due to busy working schedule, i have lost track. I almost lost my motivation and too tired throughout the process. I am taking a lots of effort to lose about 40 pounds for the past 2 years. I need motivation to get back on track. It is not an easy way. But i have too. You are right, patience is the key word. Thanks for advise.
Glad it helped, Sumarni. Think hard about why you’re doing this. Make the association between your eating and exercise and how they make you feel good.
THANK YOU!!!
That was hugely beneficial. I’m at a place where I was just starting to get discouraged (again) because I’m not seeing the results I want. Having a new perspective and a new focus (while making sure that I absolutely love what I’m doing) will surely bring motivation.
Thanks again for that!
Glad it helped. Get back to enjoying the process instead of focusing o mm the results. Get joy from the lifestyle itself and then enjoy the positive side effects.
Thank you for this post Tony!! It makes so much sense!! I’m still trying to find “my love” in the exercise world, but managing to keep myself active never the less.
Don’t be afraid to try new activities. Something is bound to stick. 🙂
I was indeed losing my motivation. My schedule is busier than when I started. So I am not gaining but not losing a’s fast as I used to. How much gym time do I need a week to keep losing. Thanks for your emails
It’s not as simple as that. You technically don’t need any gym time to lose weight. You just need an energy deficit. Exercise makes that process easier and has numerous other benefits though.
Just make sure you’re not overeating relative to your activity levels. Adjust food intake based on your body’s feedback.